This Is An Ice Nine Kills Fanfic
Psychos Only: A Very Spooky Tale © 2022 Karianne Gabaldon All Rights Reserved.
Do you like Ice Nine Kills? Here’s a story all about psychos! Don’t be fooled, it’s kind of spooky.
Psychos from across the globe get together in one place to congregate. They finally all meet each other and reside there for ten days whilst an Ice Nine Kills show is on the tenth day. Unfortunately, this story doesn’t have a happy ending. It turns out that the fans were fooled; there is not a concert on the tenth day and this just might be the end of the road for them, for something crazy is happening. The people who set it up actually hate their music and their fans, so they locked them up in a house called Brimsworth Manor and plan on keeping them there, and on the tenth day, something very awful will happen. But don’t worry, psychos, this story is one hundred percent fictitious.
Prey for them.
Chapter One: Brimsworth Manor Madness
Calling all psychos!
We are having a 10-Day congregation just for fans of Ice Nine Kills! The meet-up will be held at Brimsworth Manor in Dallas, TX. The address is 736 Norwalk Street Dallas, TX 75001. The date of the meet-up lands on June 21st, 2022. So bring your strongest vibe attire representing our favorite band and enjoy meeting your fellow fans.
Oh, and one more thing—Ice Nine Kills is going to have a special private concert just for you guys! Feel special yet? If not, you’ll be residing in the house that they stayed in last summer. And yes, I’ve made sure we have enough room, even if we have to cram 17 psychos in one room!
Have fun!
Sincerely,
INK staff
After Darla read the letter, she merely fainted. She couldn’t believe she finally got to go to their show, and not only that, she gets to meet all of the awesome people she’d been talking to for months.
“I think it’s fake. Why would they invite all of their fans and have them live in a house together, then have a special, private concert all for free? It doesn’t make sense. I think it’s fake. It’s all too good to be true,” Marla said bluntly.
“No, it’s not! It’s really the staff. Look at the envelope! Here’s the address.” Darla showed Marla the address.
“You’re way too naïve,” Marla laughed.
“You’re just not trusting. I take risks.”
“Yeah, risks? You’re risking your life, dude.”
“You’ll see, it’s real. And I’ll take many pictures to prove it. I bet the house is beautiful!”
“Yeah, okay, you’ll be dead by Tuesday.”
“Shut the fuck up, Marla.”
“I’m trying to help you out. Don’t come crying to me when—oh yeah, that’s right. You won’t be crying to me. You’ll be long gone. I’m just worried about you.”
“Don’t be,” Darla glared.
“Fine. Go!”
“I was anyway, despite what you say.”
“Okay, do what you want.”
Darla grinned, squeaked, then raced inside to immediately start packing her things. She got a text message from a fellow psycho, Ronnie, saying:
Dude! It’s happening! Trisha called it! Oh my God I can’t believe it!
Darla grew a giant, six-mile-wide grin, then texted back:
Yeah, she did! I guess I’ll see you—meet you at the manor!
She made sure to gather up and wash all of her Ice Nine Kills attire before she left. She was so nervous, but so excited.
The Day of The Congregation
Darla pulls up at Brimsworth Manor; she’s here—she’s finally here! She sees a giant white and black ‘IX’ banner atop the house. She looked around and noticed all the beautiful psychos walking around and chatting.
“Oh my God! No way, Ronnie!” Darla waved at Ronnie.
“Darla! Hi!” Ronnie rushed over towards Darla and hugged her.
“This is insane, right?” Darla smiled.
“Yes! But I’m so thrilled it’s happening! Like I said, Trisha called it!” Ronnie exclaimed; they laughed. “Where is Trisha?” he asked.
Darla shrugged her shoulders.
Meanwhile, in Delancey’s Basement…
“Please, why are you doing this?!” asked Trisha, as Delancey ties her up in a metal chair pinned to the floor.
“Shut your mouth, fuck! You psychos are so Goddamn annoying! Thinking you’re all amazing because you represent a shit band! Now sit still…”
Delancey tried to superglue her lips together but she bit her.
“Ow! Go to hell!” Delancey barked at Trisha.
“You’re never gonna get away—“
Trisha paused as Delancey pulled out a chainsaw.
“Hmm,”Delancey chuckled, “shut you up, didn’t it? Well, this baby is just one my very delightful little friends that will destroy each and every one of you little baby psychos—think you’re all big and bad now? Damn right you’re into horror, you’ll be in to horror once horror gets a taste of you little freaks! And where is your precious band, hmm? Where are they and why won’t they save you?” laughed Delancey.
“Oh, they’ll be here…” Trisha bluffed.
“…What. How do you know, that’s ridiculous to even say!”
“Is it though? Because if you know Ice Nine Kills like we do, you’d know they’ll always come to any psychos’ rescue. It’s like magic.”
“Okay,” chuckled Delancey, “get your head out of the cloud, ‘cause nobody ain’t saving you today!”
“Um, correction: you’re not being saved today… or… something… now you have my brain all fucked up from that ignorant sentence!”
“Oh, shut the fuck up!” Delancey started up the chainsaw, then suddenly , before she could even get the chainsaw going, her head was on the floor.
Spencer Charnas of Ice Nine Kills had come in to save Trisha! He decapitated Delancey with Delancey’s axe she had named Stone Cold Fox (she had a name for all of her ‘friends’) and then got going. It was a Bloodbath & Beyond that day; who knew one person could bleed out dark red, precious blood so much.
“Oh my God, Spencer! I knew it!” exclaimed Trisha as she hugged him.
“Let’s get cleaned up. Does Delancey have a husband my size?” asked Spencer.
“I don’t know if she even has a husband with that attitude.”
Both laugh.
“Okay, well it looks like I’ve got a lot of saving to do today!” Spencer stands in upright position and puts his fists on his waist; Trisha chuckles.
“I’ll catch you on the flip. Say, you didn’t happen to see how many people were out to get us, did you?” asked Spencer.
“No, I did not. But you can do it! I have faith in you! Now, run before someone finds you. I’ll do the same,” Trisha smiled.
“You go home after this, okay?” Spencer told Trisha.
“No, I’m going to help you get—“
“Go home. It’s not safe for you here. It’s not safe for any of you psychos. I’m going to get you all home safe. I promise. And then, who knows? Maybe we’ll have a real private show!”
“I love you, Spencer Charnas.” Trisha hugged Spencer as he blushed.
“Okay, let’s go. We must not waste time! Time is of the essence—time is the envy of—“
“Dude. We’re wasting time.”
“Onward.”
The two split up; Spencer headed towards Brimsworth Manor, but was he too late…?
Chapter Two: We’re All Gonna Die!
“Wow…” Darla gasped as she entered Brimsworth Manor. “Do they always live like royalty?”
“Right?” another psycho agreed, “this place is stunning! Screw your sister! We’re clearly not being scammed!”
“Yeah! I’m actually going to call her in a few to rub it in. Take some pictures. But first — my room!” her voice growled.
“Yeah, what do we do about rooms?” asked Alyanna.
“Have you met Arthur yet? He’s our key man! He’ll tell you anything you wanna know! Just go up to him, and say what’s up!” smiled Ardmore.
“Where’s Arthur?” asked Darla.
“Follow me,” smiled Ardmore.
When they got to Arthur’s office, Darla’s jaw dropped; the whole room was just gold-plated, glass-waiting-to-be-broken, high-dollar office which she had never seen before. The office was still a part of the house, but it was Arthur’s so it was special.
“Hi… Arthur?” Darla asked.
“Yes, ma’am.” Arthur turned around, swinging in his leather chair, looking like a million bucks.
“Hi, I’m wondering about the rooms? Like, how do we pick them?”
“Brilliant! I’ve chosen them for you already! Here is the chart!”
Darla holds her right index finger next to the names on the chart; she finds hers and…
“I’m sleeping in a fucking barn?!”
“Sorry, hon. We have not enough room for every psycho to slumber in Brimsworth! But it’s cute that you want to! Bye-bye now. Arthur has got important phone calls to make.”
Darla was outraged.
“Are you fucking ki—“
“I’m glad we went over the sleeping situation, now if you may, could you please kindly show the other psychos? Thank you. See your way out now, love.” Arthur winked at Darla, then spun back towards the wall.
“Dar, what the hell?!” exclaimed Kimberlee as they walked out of Arthur’s office.
“Yeah, I know! I’m pissed! Okay, now I think something is up. I’m calling my sister to have her come get me. You notify the rest of the psychos. K, babe?” Darla sighed.
“What—are you crazy—no! Darla, it’s just a coincidence. Nothing is going to happen to us. There wasn’t enough room. Simple. Please don’t ruin it. I mean, no offense, but please don’t. It’s my first time meeting you all, and seeing Ice Nine Kills. I just don’t want anything to happen. I love you though.” smiled Kimberlee.
“Yeah, you’re probably right.” Darla shook her head, partially because she was in disbelief of the fact that though it was obvious, no one had believed her. She knew she had to let it go, but it’d take awhile.
“Let’s go to our bedrooms! Dar, may we see the chart?” asked Lila.
“Must be nice,” Darla deadpanned.
“Oh, shush. You’ll be just fine. Hey, look! Adam is bunking in the barn, too, along with others! You’ll be just fine!” Lila smiled.
“Easy for you to say! You’re not the one—I’m sorry. It’s not you…” she sighs. “Thanks, Spencer.”
“Hey, now! Don’t blame Spence Char! Blame that crazy Arthur dude. He’s an ass it seems like…”
“Right. I’m sorry. I just… I thought this would be different; I thought we’d have roommates and roast fucking marshmallows by the campfire while singing Thank God It’s Friday… I thought… wrong.”
“Well, some of us have roommates… sorry… and that actually sounds like fun. We should do that tonight! Anywhere to set a campfire?”
“Lila, you’re not getting it! I wanted this to be something it’s not. Now… now I just want to go home. Not that I miss my family, or my home, but I can already tell this place isn’t going to end well for me.”
“Hmm… I’ll be right back…”
Lila runs toward her backpack, pulls out a bullhorn and hops up on the sofa.
“I knew I’d find use for this,” she says to herself.
Lila puts the bullhorn to her face, pulls the trigger and talks into it,
“Attention, psychos! We have a psycho here who is not having a good time! So… let’s give her the best damn ten days a psycho has ever had! Psychos unite!”
All of the psychos applaud and agree; Darla grins.
Lila jumps off the sofa, smiling at Darla.
“Thank you,” Darla smiled as she hugged Lila.
“It’s what psychos do,” Lila said softly.
It came time for bed and they all headed to their room while Darla and four others headed to the barn. The psychos slumber in the barn when Darla asked,
“hey, guys. Wanna hear a joke?”
“Sure!” they all exclaimed.
“I hate CPS; they never give parents another chance.”
Three psychos chuckle.
“How is that even funny?” David asks. “that’s horrible!”
“I thought it was funny,” Mara deadpanned.
“While we’re all awake, let’s go around the room and share our favorite things; Beside Ice Nine Kills and horror movies,” smiled Seth.
“Okay. You first, Seth,” Darla winked.
“Okay, well, I love my Star Wars!” Seth exclaimed. “Now you, Dar.”
“I am fascinated by art,” Darla sighed happily. “Next!”
“I really love my—“
“Dungeon Of Doom 3000,” the five psychos interrupted Kelvin in annoyance.
“Dungeon… Of Doom… 3000…” Kelvin continued softly.
Darla started busting out laughing so hard she snorted.
“Ha! You snorted!” Seth laughed.
“Kelvin, literally all you talk about is that stupid computer game!” David complained.
“It’s his thing; if he likes it, he likes it. Don’t be an ass, David!” Mara snapped.
“Yeah, David!” Serenity replied.
Darla still lied in her bed, laughing herself to tears.
“Well, goodnight, psychos. I’m going to bed,” Seth yawned.
“Me too,” Serenity replied as she lied back down.
“I’ll be right back; gotta pee. Stupid that we have to walk all the way to the house to use the bathroom. Stupid that we’re in a fucking barn actually,” David complained.
“Okay, we get it. Will you stop bitching for one moment? Stop ruining this for us! Go home if you’re not happy here! Jesus!” exclaimed Darla.
“… I’m going to the bathroom…” David deadpanned.
He left the barn and immediately felt a certain chill but ignored it. He heard footsteps through the crinkling red and brown leaves but shrugged his shoulders and walked on. David was fearless—for the most part. But tonight, his fears were about to impale him…
It was a dark, hot night with no psychos in sight; everybody was inside either sleeping or settled down. Nobody had even the slightest clue that David was even out there except for the four psychos residing in the barn, so they weren’t watching for him. The night was so pitch black that even owls couldn’t see, and it didn’t help that David was barefoot and kept stepping on rocks. Every “ouch” and “ow” was loud enough for someone six feet away to hear. So it’s only obvious that if a stalker were to be hanging around the manor, he or she would be summoned to David’s unintentional call. You’d think since they were in the city, it’d be flooded with lights, but not where Brimsworth Manor is. It’s hidden down a long country road leading to a private land, that being Brimsworth Manor. In other words, if there was a mass murder, who the fuck would know? Scary thought, right?
A figure danced upon the sidewalk with a very dimmed phone light. David noticed the light and got suspicious.
“Who’s there?” he asked.
The figure suddenly zipped across the sidewalk faster than the speed of light, gripped David’s neck, and impaled David in both eyes with a crowbar. He then let go of David’s neck and dunked David’s head on the concrete like a basketball. He gave a devilish grin, wiped off the blood with his shirt, then walked off. He left the body for the purpose of he wanted the psychos to see. He wanted to show them that he’s king psycho. Although he wasn’t talking about an Ice Nine Kills psycho… he wanted to be his own kind of psycho.
The next day, the psychos all woke up, came downstairs to get together for breakfast, and a few gathered up outside only to find David’s head shattered on the cement, with brain matter spilled all over. The psychos shrieked their inner demons away and a few ran to tell Arthur as fast as they could, only Arthur was not there. So, they called the people in charge and the people in charge told them that there was nothing they could do; to just ride it out until the show.
“Are you fucking kidding me?!” Anya screamed into the phone as she hung it up.
“What did they say?” asked Darla.
Anya held her head, slid down the wall onto her knees and broke down.
“Nothing… they said… nothing…”
Darla rubbed her back slowly.
“I’m sorry. But I told you guys.”
“Darla, now is not the time!” yelled Adam.
Darla rolled her eyes.
“Guys, let’s just eat…” said Adam.
“What about the body?” Valencia worried.
“Leave it. Unless you want to pick it up!”
Valencia shook her head rapidly.
“Okay then!”
After breakfast, Anya went to go do her laundry down in the basement. Everyone else was playing video games and listening to Ice Nine Kills. She wanted to hurry up so she could do the same. She got her clothes out of the dryer, put them in the laundry basket, then started to head upstairs. But as she got closer to the top of the stairs, someone pulled her and she stumbled down 16 stairs. She had broken many bones so she couldn’t get up. The man walked up to her in a smiling pig mask and pliers; he reached for the tip of Anya’s nose.
“No! Please! Stop, you fucker! Stop!”
The man covered her screams with a bandanna. He, then used a nail gun to nail Anya’s hands together so she couldn’t move them – instead, she could only focus on how painful it was. He grabbed the pliers and reached for her nose, cut the tip off until it bled like a fountain of Kool-Aid. He cut off both her earlobes, her nipples, and her pinky fingers and pinky toes. Her screaming started to sound like squealing through the bandanna; she squealed and squealed and she started losing her breath and consciousness. The man finished her off with a slit to the throat. She was done; Anya was over. The man walked off, whistling Farmer In The Dell. It wasn’t until five hours later when anyone actually found Anya. But when they did, all hell broke lose…
“That’s it; that’s fucking it! I’m doing something about this; psychos are dying! This is not fucking cool!” Adam yelled.
“Anyone know how to get a hold of Spencer?” asked Cara.
“Stupid question, Cara!” yelled Adam.
“Hey, she’s just making suggestions, Adam…” Darla pointed out.
“I know. I’m sorry, Cara,” sighed Adam.
“It’s okay. This whole thing just messes with your head, I get it!” Cara replied.
“Yes, definitely.” Adam gave Cara a hug and they started brainstorming ideas on how to escape since their cars were ‘valeted’.
“We cannot sleep tonight; none of us. We have got to catch this person. And if one of us falls asleep, we can’t,” Darla declared.
“Yes, but also, nobody going outside…” Cara noted.
“… Or even out of their rooms!” Adam exclaimed.
“That’s right. We must all stick together. We have to hold out this next week. We can do this!” exclaimed Darla.
“Here’s the plan: we’ll have a buddy system from now on. Everyone, pick a buddy! That’s who you bunk with at night. And also, it’d save room for those who can’t sleep inside,” Adam insisted.
“Yes! Perfect!” exclaimed Cara.
Everyone agreed.
That Night…
“Where the hell do you think you’re going?” Darla asked Adam.
“I’ll be right back; I just need a glass of orange juice.”
“Whoa, no! No, no, no, no, no! You are not going anywhere, you hear me?! Stay,” Alison grabbed Adam’s body and sat him down by force.
“What’s the big deal? It’s just downstairs, y’all! It’s not like the killer can get to me that quick! Stop panicking!” laughed Adam.
“No way! Um… then I’m coming with you, if you really need to fucking go…” Darla tugged his sleeve. “Let’s go, doll face.”
“No!” Adam exclaimed.
“No?” Darla gave him an estranged look.
“No!”
“Dude, are you trying to get yourself killed? Darla’s just trying to help! Jesus!” Kimora exclaimed.
“I understand that, but I don’t need it. I will be fine. And to prove it, I’m leaving my phone here. On this table. See?” Adam dropped his phone on the coffee table and showed his hands.
“Fine. But if you die—“ Darla added.
“I. Won’t. Die. Okay?” Adam interrupted.
“Better not; we can’t lose another psycho!” sighed Alison.
“Yup. I’m gonna go now. Be back in five.”
The reality? Adam really wanted to catch this guy, and he didn’t tell anyone else because he knew they’d stop him. So, he waltzed into the kitchen, waiting for the killer to strike. Five minutes later and he hadn’t shown yet.
“Fuck this, I’m going back upstairs. They’re probably worried about me,” he said to himself.
He took three steps around the corner and out popped the killer, wearing a pig mask and a black cloak with gold trim.
“Ha! Got ya! Wait until the girls see this!”
The masked man just stood there. Adam grabbed him by the neck and tried to take off his mask.
“Come on, you bastard!”
The pig man karate-chopped Adam’s arm to the point of Adam shrieking, then reached into his tool box for a hammer. He took out the hammer, started beating Adam senselessly on the collarbone until eventually it broke and drew blood.
“Look, man. I’m sorry. I’m sorry, I’m so sorry…” he squealed.
The pig man took the back of the hammer and jabbed it into Adam’s throat, leaving Adam speechless… literally. He, then yanked out the hammer from Adam’s throat, placed it in his eye socket, then pulled it out again. This time, he pulled out his eye. For some crazed reason, Adam’s heart was still beating, so Pig Man dug the back of the hammer into Adam’s chest wall. His heart had officially stopped, and Pig Man, once again, left the body there just to torture the psychos. He washed his hammer in the kitchen sink, then slowly walked away, whistling ‘Farmer In The Dell’.
“Where’s Adam? I’m worried about him. So worried.” Darla sighed and sat down on the wooden floor.
“C’mon, Dar. Let’s go look for him,” smiled Alison.
They looked around downstairs, but once they got to the kitchen area, they were both in shock.
“Oh my God, Adam!” screamed Darla.
“Who the fuck is doing this?!” exclaimed Alison.
“Me. It’s all me,” the pig man smiled through his mask.
Both the girls looked behind them as their jaws dropped.
“You’re-you’re-you’re,” Alison feared.
“What’s wrong, kid? Got a stuttering problem? It’s me. Your worst nightmare,” pig man explained.
Darla took off his mask, surprised to see it was Arthur.
“Oh my God!” Alison exclaimed.
Pig man vigorously stabbed Darla six times, Alison ran upstairs. Pig man walked upstairs slowly, every step creaking.
“Guys! He’s here! And Adam and Darla are dead! It’s been Arthur this entire time!” Alison screamed in panic.
“…Arthur?”
Chapter Three: Our Favorite Heroes
Everyone in the room panicked and tried to find an escape.
“Hey! Let’s use the window!” exclaimed Harold.
“Yes, great idea, Harold!” Donna smiled.
Everyone lined up for the window.
“Shh—you hear that?” Alison whispered as pig man was closer and his steps were heard. “He’s getting closer! We’ve gotta go, now! No time to waste!”
Five out of seventeen psychos made it out before pig man came.
“No! Please, no!” Donna begged as pig man slit her throat.
Then, Alison heard steps again as pig man was brutally murdering every psycho one by one.
“Oh my God, there’s more?” Alison asked.
Pig man scratched his head, for there wasn’t anyone else. So who could it be…?
When the door opened…
“Spencer!”
Alison ran up to Spencer and hugged him tightly.
“It’s okay, I’ve got this.”
Spencer ripped a leg off the wooden bed frame and impaled Arthur. Arthur, still alive, picked up a gun from his bag and shot him in the chest. Spencer collapsed at the scene.
“Spencer! What have you done, Arthur?”
Arthur laughed, “don’t worry; Spencer isn’t the only one dying tonight! I’m going to kill you, and your stupid psycho family, along with the Ice Nine Kills clique!”
“Wait, what?!” Alison asked, confused.
“I hate this stupid band and I hate you psychos! Ice Nine Kills are shit. They just—I don’t like ‘em!”
“Please, have you no mercy?”
“Nope, I sure don’t!” Arthur chuckled as he raised his crowbar, about to kill Alison.
Arthur collapsed after three gunshots were fired. Alison looked around, then looked in the doorway and out popped Joe. He smiled at Alison then found Spencer on the floor.
“You go! I’ll stay and try to wake him up!” Joe shooed her out of the room.
“Okay.”
Spencer woke up and saw that Arthur was dead.
“We’ve gotta go, man. Come on! I’ve gotta get you to a hospital,” Joe cried.
All of the psychos were outside and Patrick pulled up in a van, followed by Ricky and his van.
“Hop in, psychos!” smiled Patrick.
They all got in the van and were safe, finally. Joe took Spencer to an Emergency Room nearby. It took weeks for Spencer to fully recover, but luckily the bullet hit no organs. As for the psychos, they made it home safely. Everyone turned out fine, Ice Nine Kills had a concert to honor all deceased psychos from that time period. They even made a song about it. It’s safe to say that everyone will be all right.
To all the psychos out there, I love you and hope you enjoyed this story. Thanks for reading!
Crazy Kari’s Diary 